Entry 027 - I’ve been living in my car for months. I think I found out why we actually moved nuclear testing underground.

 Around four months ago, I inherited my father's footlocker and started posting about what I found inside. If you've been following me since September, you know some of this already, but if you're new, I'm sorry, this is going to probably be a lot, but I need to get everything out while I have the chance.

They've been deleting my posts and scrubbing my accounts. I've been banned from r/ conspiracy, had posts removed from r/ HighStrangeness, and lost access to two Reddit accounts. Something appears to be actively hunting what I share online. I call it the DG, or the Digital Ghost, and I know the name sounds stupid, but that's all it is to me. A fucking ghost. A goddamn taunterer. I don't know if it's the government, some system they have in place, or if it's just corporate censorship bullshit, or something else.

I've been on the run since, I think, October, but it's hard to tell. I've been sleeping in my car and moving every few days. In those months, I've visited people I shouldn't have visited and found things nobody should have found. And it feels like they've been getting closer and closer. But before I'm gone, you need to know what they did, and what they're still doing under every single one of our fucking noses.

My grandfather was RMC Daniel Mercer. He was a U.S. Navy Chief Radioman. He served aboard the USS Tawasa and gave the military twenty-five years of service, from 1950 to 1975. When he died in 2018, he left me everything, and that included the footlocker (more of a repurposed ammo box, but he always called it his footlocker) he'd kept in his garage.

Inside were classified documents and audio reels, photographs, handwritten logs, poems from seamen, and a note that said: 'If you're reading this, I'm sorry. Please burn this.'

I should have burned it all to Hell as he said to, because the files contained detailed reports of a Cold War program called Project ARCHER, a joint U.S.-Soviet operation to track and neutralize what they called 'ANTs' or 'Aberrant Non-Terrestrial Signatures.'

Every nuclear detonation since at least 1945 has ripped holes in the fabric between our reality and something else. Some of the earlier notes just refer to it as the Outside. Ours, by implication, is the Inside; though no one wrote that down, and it's more just me theorizing what the hell this thing is. Trying to conceptualize it the best I could.

ANTs are entropic fields. My grandfather's logs refer to them as 'deaf spots.' Basically, areas where sound dies, light doesn't behave properly, and anything that gets caught inside gets erased.

Those shadows on the walls in Hiroshima? Everyone thinks they're burn marks from the blast, but those were people, what was left after they were pulled Outside.

Both the U.S. and the Soviets knew about this by 1946. The Cold War, the arms race, the tension, a lot of it was just for show. Behind all the bombs and the so-called 'stand-offs' is that they were cooperating. Tracking these things and trying to contain them.

The 1963 Nuclear Test Ban Treaty was about panic. Every atmospheric test was creating more ANTs. Spreading what they called Secondary Exposure Fatalities (SEF).

They had realized that testing above ground would tear us apart, and so they went underground, and their projects went with them.

One of the earliest files I found was of Operation Wigwam, a supposed "anti-submarine weapons test" off the coast of California on May 14, 1955. But of course, this was also bullshit. Project ARCHER had been tracking a massive ANT signature, one they named ANT-Sierra, 12,000 feet below the surface. For 72 hours, my grandfather and the crew of the USS Tawasa sat above it.

It was absorbing sonar pings and creating dead zones on every screen. So, they dropped a 30-kiloton depth charge directly on it and tried to collapse it with a 'shock-induced cavitation collapse.'

It failed badly.

ANT-Sierra shattered and broke into three smaller signatures that fled into the Pacific Ocean. They lost track of them, and they lost men for nothing.

Seaman Russell Alden. My grandfather's friend. Officially 'lost at sea.' But in reality, he was diagnosed with Acute SEF; Fifth-degree exposure. His body violently folded inward and left only a shadow on the tug boat.

They then airbrushed him from the division photo (which I can share if I need to).

Another sailor, Seaman Franklin Weeks Young, left a poem the night before Wigwam. Weeks knew he wasn't coming back. I tried finding him in Navy records, and he doesn't exist. He wasn't on any USS Tawasa crew registries or in the National Archives.

I posted the poem here yesterday.

The logs say that ARCHER tracked ANTs and that Project GABRIEL studied what happened to the people exposed to them. It started as a medical program; officially, they were studying radiation effects on survivors, those from Hiroshima, Nagasaki, and the Marshall Islands. But people exposed to ANTs developed SEF, not radiation sickness. and it progresses in stages:

Stage I: They say Stage 1 is surface lesions. 'Keloid' scars that grow into patches of just darkness, 'optically negative tissue.' Literal fucking voids on the skin.

Stage II: This is where internal damage is reported to happen. Cells will vanish, and organs will start developing the voids like stage 1. MRI scans would show just a black empty spot where tissue should have been.

Stage III: They called this one 'stabilization.' It says that some patients plateaued and created what I am calling Living Portals.

Stage IV: The files get kind of contradictory here. Some of them say it is a 'terminal cascade.' While others say it is an 'asset activation.'

But the baseline is that they experimented on anyone they could get their hands on. 'Legally' and otherwise.

GABRIEL's worst experiments were done on kids.

They targeted children exposed to fallout, downwinders from Nevada tests, and kids near Hanford, Washington. They identified ones showing early symptoms and brought them in for 'medical studies.'

I found the tapes. And one of them is Subject 11B, a 12-year-old boy from Utah named Jimmy. In 1957, they brought him to a GABRIEL facility for testing. On the tapes, he describes things I don't even want to type here. I don't have the stomach for it. But they sent him back home for observation the next day. A week later, his family's dog died. When they brought him back, the doctors asked what had happened, and he said: 'I don't know. I got mad and I just... I made it stop being there.'

He killed their dog. A goddamn 12-year-old boy.

The files say they transferred him to 'permanent custody' in 1959. There is a death certificate dated 1961. But I found a Social Security record showing activity under his name until at least 1987. I tried finding Jimmy, and I found his family instead. What was left, I guess. His mother died in 2003, but I talked to his cousin, who remembered him. She said he disappeared in the early 60s, and that the family assumed he ran away. His father was an alcoholic who abused Jimmy before his death by cop in 1963.

A lot more has been found, and I've included everything in an archive here. It's for every post I made. I started it after posts started disappearing.

The latest thing I found, and the last thing I'll share before I have to go, is a file I found two weeks ago.

1986, Tulsa, Oklahoma. Shadow Hills Psychiatric Hospital. A facility that's been around since the 70s and was shut down in 2019.

A mother was approached by hospital staff and offered $15,000 to enroll her twin boys in a 'behavioral study' for two weeks. It was supposed to be a non-invasive and purely mild psychological test. And so she agreed.

From the file, what they actually did was separate the twins so they could not see or speak to each other, put them in identical rooms, had them watch the same cartoons at the same time, and then they'd introduce a stressor to one twin; take away his TV, or yell at him, or any form of mild physical punishment.

The other twin, still watching cartoons in his room, would start to cry, experiencing the same emotions. He was feeling what his brother felt, though nothing was happening to him.

Then they exposed one twin to something. The file doesn't say what they used, but I'd assume some type of ANT fragment. The boy developed stage III symptoms. The voids opened on his body. And this is where it gets really fucked up.

The voids on Twin A were connected to Twin B. They'd put objects into Twin A's apertures, and they'd come out of Twin B's body. And so they kept going. They put bigger and bigger objects inside. Then they decided, for some fucked up reason, to put Twin B inside Twin A. Sent one brother into the other brother's body. It's as fucked up as it sounds.

Twin B never came back. When the two weeks were up, they returned Twin to his mother. She, of course, asked where the hell her other son was. On the papers, which the one I am currently looking at appears to be a transcript log, Shadow Hills staff say to her: "There was no other boy. You only enrolled one child."

She tried to sue. She presented birth certificates and photos to prove she had twins. But Shadow Hill's lawyers presented their enrollment forms. Hospital records. And it showed they only ever had one boy. The mother kept fighting, but over time, Twin A stopped mentioning his brother. It appears that by the early 90s, he'd convinced himself he'd always been an only child. She had committed suicide a few years later, when Twin A had left the house.

There are so many things still left in the locker I have yet to read, and reels I haven't had the time to listen to.

If you start to feel pressure behind your eyes, static or ringing, maybe a hum in moments where it should be quiet, lost time, the sense you're being watched inside your head, then you are already affected. I am so sorry. I didn't mean to spread it. But part of me thinks I might have. Part of me wanted to. Not to hurt anyone, but to share it so it doesn't disappear for good.

My grandfather archived everything but never shared it. He fought that urge for over forty years. I can't.

If anyone has questions, I’ll answer when I can. If I can.